the plant dream (from nov 20th)
Some men were building a garden where I grew up. They dug a big pit that used to be a house, and I saw a room in it with some friends right before the dig. it was part of Holton, my old school. They filled the pit with sand and offered us to be part of it if we contributed something. I decide to go buy more sand for my portion, and caught a ride with some guys in a big truck to the garden. I see some children prancing down the garden with tools and plants to grow in the sand. I get annoyed because of that, and because the workers say I should have brought my own plants like the children, not more sand because they have tons of that. Plus I can't catch a ride home with them b/c they're busy with the garden. It's too long a walk home.
Later I dream of just having my own tomato plant in my kitchen. It grows really nicely. It looks so cute and pretty in my kitchen, and I'm excited that I can eat my own tomatoes because I use and eat them in all kinds of favorite foods. I see a worm on a plate wriggling, nowhere near the tomato. I smash it with my tomato and wash it off. I think about buying more seeds, but of the nice chic variety from the market on 77th. Then I look at my tomato plant and see a hot pepper plant in place of it. It's wierd because I never wanted a pepper plant in the first place. I have no use for it, never cook with it. It has no fruit on it, but instead has the roots coming out of the soil (like my orchid now). I pull on stems buried in the soil, thinking I can make the plant look better, and instead i'm surprised when they turn out to be roots. As they come out, the parts that were buried are covered with tomato sauce. I'm confused because I'm wondering why it has to come out like that. Now I have messed up the plant and it looks ugly and jacked, not cute or pretty.
-My interpretation: I think the sand garden is my past, and my buying more sand is my not getting over bitterness about that past, simply wanting to add more "sand" rather than growing from the past. It's frustrating and useless. The fruit is about my future. I could choose to do something that will be incredibly fruitful, so much that I can smash undesirable things that attempt to stop me. Nothing will stop me. Or I could choose to do something I don't want to really do, and at the roots of that effort will only be a little bit of the things I really love to do. And it will not bear any fruit, although it will still be a strong plant otherwise.
Interesting that susan said the trials from the past few years will contribute to my future in helping somehow.
Some men were building a garden where I grew up. They dug a big pit that used to be a house, and I saw a room in it with some friends right before the dig. it was part of Holton, my old school. They filled the pit with sand and offered us to be part of it if we contributed something. I decide to go buy more sand for my portion, and caught a ride with some guys in a big truck to the garden. I see some children prancing down the garden with tools and plants to grow in the sand. I get annoyed because of that, and because the workers say I should have brought my own plants like the children, not more sand because they have tons of that. Plus I can't catch a ride home with them b/c they're busy with the garden. It's too long a walk home.
Later I dream of just having my own tomato plant in my kitchen. It grows really nicely. It looks so cute and pretty in my kitchen, and I'm excited that I can eat my own tomatoes because I use and eat them in all kinds of favorite foods. I see a worm on a plate wriggling, nowhere near the tomato. I smash it with my tomato and wash it off. I think about buying more seeds, but of the nice chic variety from the market on 77th. Then I look at my tomato plant and see a hot pepper plant in place of it. It's wierd because I never wanted a pepper plant in the first place. I have no use for it, never cook with it. It has no fruit on it, but instead has the roots coming out of the soil (like my orchid now). I pull on stems buried in the soil, thinking I can make the plant look better, and instead i'm surprised when they turn out to be roots. As they come out, the parts that were buried are covered with tomato sauce. I'm confused because I'm wondering why it has to come out like that. Now I have messed up the plant and it looks ugly and jacked, not cute or pretty.
-My interpretation: I think the sand garden is my past, and my buying more sand is my not getting over bitterness about that past, simply wanting to add more "sand" rather than growing from the past. It's frustrating and useless. The fruit is about my future. I could choose to do something that will be incredibly fruitful, so much that I can smash undesirable things that attempt to stop me. Nothing will stop me. Or I could choose to do something I don't want to really do, and at the roots of that effort will only be a little bit of the things I really love to do. And it will not bear any fruit, although it will still be a strong plant otherwise.
Interesting that susan said the trials from the past few years will contribute to my future in helping somehow.
posted by icc @ 10:50 AM
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